Cancer Is the Best + Worst Part of My Life

The other day, I was feeling super annoyed and frustrated with myself. 

I was fighting a bad cold and I was exhausted. I’m working to heal my adrenals (which are shot after my cancer ordeal). 

I was lying in bed beating myself up for succumbing to a cold and ruminating about how things used to be. I used to be superwoman! I traveled the world, managed a team, produced so much work, could do so many things … these days I can only do a fraction of what I used to be able to do.

The thing about being a coach is that you’ve got to be doing this transformational work yourself. I hold myself to the same standard that I hold my clients, so I immediately caught that thought (“I can only do a fraction of what I used to do”) and turned it around: 

I am so grateful that I get to do this work of helping women heal themselves from cancer. I might be physically capable of doing only a “fraction” of the work I could do before - but the work I was doing before was only a fraction fulfilling. 

And as I was writing in my journal later that week, this thought came to me: 

Cancer is the best and worst part of my life. 

Living with cancer was traumatic. I had to sleep sitting up for months after my abdominal surgery and kidney complications. I struggled with horrible headaches. The day-to-day grind of physically feeling awful really took a toll. 

Then there’s the emotional territory to travail: the fear, the uncertainty. Literally not knowing if you’ll be alive in two weeks, two months, two years…

That’s the worst part of cancer. And it is the worst. If you’re going through this, my friend: I see you. I know. 

But like anything, there’s a flip side…

The worst experiences in our lives can often give rise to some of the best experiences in our lives. There’s magic in misery. 

The best part of cancer is that I can see things for what they are. 

My cancer experience has weeded out my relationships. I know exactly who is going to stand by me, because they already have. And it became crystal clear who no longer had a place in my life. 

Likewise, my own cancer journey has given me the utmost privilege of walking other women through their cancer journeys, to share the tools that have made me stronger, and to help you find hope and ultimately healing. 

 That’s the best part of my cancer.

P.S. To find magic in your cancer join DARE Cancer coaching community, we start in January. Learn more about DARE Cancer and get on the list to be the first to hear when doors open!